6 Weeks!

It is December 22nd, and we are 6 weeks along today.  It has been a very long 2 weeks so far; I can only imagine what the next few months are going to be like.

We found out December 8th that we were pregnant.  The home pregnancy test was a digital one, so it very clearly said "pregnant."  I had woken Stephen up to tell him I was going to take the test (and couldn't wait any longer because I really had to go to the bathroom).  Every single test I've ever taken we've looked at together, and this one was no different.  When the timer went off, we looked, and there it was!

The first thing Stephen did was pray, which was the best thing he could have done.  We were happy, but more than anything, we were scared.  After losing the last baby, it is terrifying to think that we could go through that again.  But no matter how hard we try, there is no way to keep ourselves from getting attached to this one.

We tried to get our parents together to tell them all at once again.  But if I called and did the same thing as last time, they would know (or at least be suspicious).  So we ended up buying picture frames that said something about grandchildren being the greatest gifts, and in the photo area I made a "For a picture of Baby Washburn coming on or around August 17, 2013" card.  Then we took them over to each of their houses and gave it to them.  As soon as we randomly walked in the door and handed them a present, they all pretty much knew.  There were tears and hugs and little dances.  But we were only 4 weeks, so we all knew it was a long road ahead.

We haven't exactly been keeping it a secret, but we haven't been telling a lot of people either.  Having to notify everyone of the miscarriage last time was really hard.  But at the same time, we want people to know if we miscarry because we want to have the support of family and friends.  Plus, it's so hard to keep this a secret!

I think my first cravings were the Sweet Potato Smashfries and Smashburger.  They sounded so good, when most food did not sound appealing at all.  I haven't really been sick (at least I haven't thrown up), but I've been nauseous off and on and food just hasn't sounded very good.

Last week, so at about 5 and a half weeks, there was some spotting Tuesday night.  When I saw it, my arms went numb.  I think it was adrenaline.  It was too similar to what we'd experienced before and it terrified me.  I took the next day off of work.  Luckily, I had told some good friends at work about the pregnancy (and they also knew about the miscarriage), so they all covered for me and made it really easy.  I pretty much stayed in bed the next day.  I don't know if bed rest would help this early in pregnancy, but I figured it certainly wouldn't hurt.  Stephen came home during lunch and worked from here the rest of the day.  We did a blood test that night, and the results were good.  My progesterone level was at 17 (over 10 is good) and my hcg level was above 33,000!  Which is really high.  Stephen says it's twins.  We did another hcg level test on Friday morning (about 36 hours later), and it was up above 47, 0000, which is a pretty good increase.  From what I've read, the hcg level should double approximately every 72 hours.  And even though my body doesn't really deal with miscarriage well, I don't think the hcg level would be rising if I wasn't still pregnant.

We have our first ultrasound with T on December 27th.  I'm so excited for it to be with her, someone who cares about us as individuals and not just another patient.  I was the sickest I've been this morning. I was at the point where I was debating whether I needed to head to the bathroom to throw up or not.  As much as I hate throwing up, I want to so bad right now because it would be another sign that this was actually happening.  I know not all women throw up, but it is a classic pregnancy symptom.

I have had to go to the bathroom a lot, which is good.  I think I have a cyst, which T says is good (and normal) because it secretes hormones.  It's painful sometimes, and it makes me worried when there's pain in that area, but if it's helping the baby, bring it on.  I have been craving deviled egg sandwiches on whole wheat english muffins with a piece of green leaf lettuce on the top.  How's that for very specific?  But it's not an unhealthy craving.  And it gets me some protein and a little bit of vegetables.  So I've had them the last two days.  And they've never tasted so good.

The last two weeks have been very emotional.  Checking for spotting every time I go to the bathroom, being crazy in tune with every twinge and cramp coming from the area, plus having crazy amounts of hormones making everything even more emotional that it would have been otherwise.  But at the same time, I am so excited for this baby.  We are praying all the time, and I know we've got tons of prayers out there with our family and friends who believe that God can make miracles happen.  So here's to our little miracle.